Joint Custody

I’ve been living with my roommate for 3 years. It’s a townhouse, that my roommate owns, from which I rent my bedroom, access to the garage, kitchen, living room, bathroom (both a full and a ½), coat closet, appliances (both kitchen and laundry) and the desk top computer in our “office” (which is really a guest room, since neither of us work out of that room).

Her computer, a DELL (“dude, you’re getting a dell”…what happened to that guy?), has to be one of the slowest computers in the history of computers. Yes, this is the same roommate who has a “stereo” that is really a boombox without an AUX jack. Why would I think she would have a modern computer? We have been though all kinds of Internet providers, Verizon, Comcast, back to Verizon; whoever has the best deal where we can lock in at a discount price for the first 6 months. I used to blame the slowness of the computer on the Internet provider – right, like that isn’t your first instinct too?

A few months ago, amongst our never ending game of switch the provider we got wireless Internet, under the advisement of the customer service rep that said wireless Internet has a higher connection speed. Why would we get wireless Internet with a freaking desktop computer? My roommate decided that wireless was a good idea. So we dusted off my laptop and started surfing the net from the living room. I was in favor of this new computing option because the ice cream chair (that is apparently the official name for the style of chair) used at the desk in our “office” is one of the most uncomfortable chairs I have ever rested by butt on. I believe computing is more enjoyable when you are sitting in a comfy chair.

Never in my wildest dreams did I believe that my roommate would become obsessed with computing. She can spend hours on her day off on the computer. Not playing games, not updating her Facebook status, not IMing friends, not downloading music. What does she do? She reads blogs. Blogs written by total strangers. She is one of those grass is always greener people; always looking that what everyone else has, is doing or saying is better than what she has, is doing or saying.

For all intensive purposes, we share this computer; but I’m the owner.

So what? When I get the computer, only on the days when she is working until 11pm, I update my blog, change my Facebook status, find friends, etc. Today, I made a comment to my friend Katie about following her blog and her not returning the favor (by made a comment I mean wrote on her wall). I came home from work today, with the intention of updating my blog – mostly to see if my friend has taken me up on my offer to follow the blog. I opened my laptop and WHAM – a new wallpaper - my face side-by-side my roommate’s face; a picture from a vacation we took a few years ago. Not the baby Presley wallpaper I was expecting! Not really a great picture to boot!

Joint: united, joined or sharing with another.
Custody: immediate charge and control exercised by a person or authority

The three-legged limp

Winter, rain, cold, and snow - these are words that my dog, Presley, fully understands. You even begin a sentence or section of a sentence with an “s” and Presley already knows what lies ahead of her. I always thought that dogs had a small brain, had hard times remembering things from day to day, week to week. Winter is only a few months long, it only happens once a year, but she remembers, year after year. There have even been a winter or two in her short life where the snowfall was so minimal that I harder remember it happened.

Presley has never been a fan of the snow. Maybe it has to do with the first winter I had her. I bought Presley from a very strange lady in late January 2006, one week after my 25th birthday. Two weeks following, Presley met a rather large snowfall face first – literately. It’s not easy to house train a puppy, those of you who have done it can vouch for that. A good master lets a puppy out every few hours for the first few weeks or months of ownership, teaching him or her where to go to the bathroom. In our case, it was in our front yard. Presley was so tiny that I didn’t get her a collar or leash for several weeks; even I can out run a 10-week-old puppy. Anyway, back to that second week of life in the Minto house.

It was by Baltimore standards a major snowstorm. As a native of upstate New York, having lived several young years in upstate Maine (any by upstate I mean 1 hour past the end of I-95) and many formative years in south Jersey, I have a very different concept of a major snowstorm. But in Baltimore, things were pretty much shut down. I guess I was happy to have the luxury of spending the day in my pajamas with my new puppy; we can call that bonding. Presley had to go outside, as all puppies do so I opened the door and out she ran, face first into the 8-inch snowdrift that had formed on the opposite side of our front door. BAM – face full of snow.

Now, three short years later, Presley is much more cautious and aware of the white, ice cold, solid precipitation that can be found falling from the sky or gathered on the ground. Presley typically will hold her bathroom breaks for days if needed, just to avoid the snow. There have been many times when she hasn’t even made it off the front stoop; but when she does, she does a three-legged limp. Her paws get so cold from the sidewalk, snow and ice, that she lifts them up, often times forgetting that she needs them to stand on. Last night, she had enough guts to lift up three legs, standing still, teetering on just one freeze cold paw. Cute as a button, shivering like a leaf, scared like she had made a bad decision. She growls, I scoop her up, she licks my nose and we head home. I had to do all the walking.

How many more days of winter?

BoomBox…ever heard of one?

I’m in the middle of planning my 28th birthday party – a simple and sophisticated gathering at my house with a bunch of A-listers! As I’m thinking of what to drink (Miller Lite and Corona), what to eat (another question entirely) and what to do to keep the party the event of the year – I thought MUSIC! I like to consider myself a music lover, I have so many songs from so many different eras, genres and artists…I figured there will be something for everyone; not to mention my roommates recent obsession with Akon.

I knew that I need to do some work on ITunes, getting new songs, adding and changing playlists, removing those sappy love songs that remind me of past relationships that I like to turn up loud and sing along to on long car rides (you know what songs I’m talking about). I knew also that I would need to review the stereo situation, making sure I had the required wires. It’s not my stereo; it’s my roommate’s. She has the main component hidden in the bottom cabinet of our TV armoire, with two speakers on either side.

Now I grew up with a stereo. My dad was a big music guy. He loved to crank it up, playing random songs to which he loved to sing along. I’m not certain that any of his neighbors loved his taste. His stereo even had a 6 disc CD changer. The CD changer was one of those book like things were you load the CDs and then insert into the stereo. Not to mention the two full size detected speakers – of course they were wired to main the component meaning you could only place them next to the main component without running yards of wire all over the house. It is by no means cutting edge for 2008 – but in the mid 90’s it was a large and impressive piece of audio equipment.

Back to my roommates “stereo” – we do not listen to it often, maybe once and awhile we have played the radio, but mostly it remains in off mode and tucked away behind the cabinet door. I was excited to realize it was there so I could use it at my party. My intention was to buy an AUX cable (I didn’t know what that was until after this story unfolds) and connect it where the headphones would connect. BOY am I glad I didn’t do that. After further conversation with my AV guy (yes, I have one), it was decided that the headphones jack is not an AUX jack. That was certainly the best way to connect my Ipod to my stereo, but I needed to find the AUX jack. My AV guy was certain the AUX jack, if not in the front of the stereo, it would be in the back. After a trip to BestBuy at lunch, it was decided that I should look at the stereo before making a $14.99 purchase of an AUX cable.

What I failed to mention until now is that this “stereo” is not a stereo, at least not to the stereo standards that I am accustomed to. It is a freak’n boombox! A boombox?!?! Okay, so a boombox, now that we are over the shock of that, my roommate tells me that this boombox will also be celebrating a birthday – it’s 28th birthday! My roommate has had this boombox since she was in like the 8th grade. She graduated high school in 1999 – you do the math. Bottom line is, after further inspection following the advice of my AV guy, I found out that this stereo is so old it doesn’t even have an AUX jack. Not anywhere on the box is there an AUX jack. There is no way for me to connect my Ipod to the boombox to play great playlists at my party. Maybe I’ll make a mix tape as a party favor. Oh yeah…the boombox has a dual tape deck. That will make recording the mix tape making go even faster.

The Year in Review

Each year, TIME magazine puts together a full-length edition displaying images, text and memories as we move from one year to the next. Here is a recap of 5 of my favorite news stories from 2008; however my words are not as good as the real thing. If you can still find it on newsstands, pick it up. If for not any other reason than just to have it – 2008 was a historical year and you should want something to remember it by.

1. The meltdown – “firms that seemed sturdy pillars of the nation’s wealth were exposed as hollow shells and trillions of dollars of American’s wealth went up in smoke in a stock market meltdown” (TIME).

An image in TIME showed a young woman joined in the protest on Wall Street on Sept 25th holding a sign, “I’ve got a 4.0 GPA, $90,000 in debt & No Job. Where’s My Bail Out?” American’s were paying the highest gas prices in my lifetime, losing their jobs on Wall Street as famous US companies entered into Chapter 11, while declaring Chapter 11 themselves because they couldn’t pay their sub-prime mortgage. Just this week we learned that a former top executive from Merrill-Lynch, who was only employed for 4 weeks prior to the meltdown took a $25-million payout and purchased a $35-million apartment in New York City.

What’s next? How will American recover? Can American recover? Will we rise again?

2. Rock Star vs. Old White-haired Guy – an election that made history, both in the cast of characters, the media criticism and the voting turnout. Can President-elect Obama fulfill his campaign promises? Does he have the leadership to rebuild this nation, to concur and overcome the economic crisis? Will he put American’s back to work?

I pointed to a picture of Barack Obama and asked my 7 year old niece if she knew who he was. She said “that is Borock Bobmma and he is the President.” I pointed to John McCain, asking the same question. Her response “that is John McLame, the guy that tried to be President but lost”. I couldn’t have summed it up better. Borock Bobmma and John McLame.

3. Yearning for Zion – Texas state authorities raided the compound, which is part of the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints, taking over 400 children into protective custody. TIME writer Hilary Hylton wrote “the state is not saying ‘Don’t wear those dresses’. It is saying you can’t have sex with 11-year olds”. The state of Texas later released the children back into their mother’s care, who ultimately returned to the Yearning for Zion ranch and their polygamist families.

4. Michael Phelps and the Beijing Olympics – The tone of the Olympic games was set with the split second underwater shot of Phelps reaching the wall first over Serbia swimmer Milorad Cavic. It was clear at that moment that Phelps’ dream of winning 7 gold metals in a combination of 7 team and individual races was going to become a reality.

Much inline with the political figures, I pointed to Michael Phelps and asked my niece who he was. She said “hum, that’s the guy who won 7 gold metals. I don’t remember his name.” I said “Michael Phelps”. She said “oh yeah, Michael Felts.”

5. The fall of another – Eliot Spitzer was not a common name in much of the country prior to 2008, mostly due to his very public sex scandal. I’m not convinced that even following the negative press, many American’s even remember his name in light of all the other news of 2008. I thought his “fame” was worth mentioning. I’m sure it is a moment that he will never forget, despite if the rest of us remember.

In addition to the news coverage of 2008 as reviewed in TIME’s The Year in Review – they list milestones, celebrating the life and work of those who pasted in 2008. Again, I have pulled my favorites.

Tim Russert, 1950-2008
Paul Newman, 1925 – 2008
Jesse Helms, 1921 – 2008
George Carlin, 1937 – 2008
Charlton Heston, 1923 – 2008
Heath Ledger, 1979 – 2008
Bernie Mac, 1957 – 2008

The most important milestone to me was not covered by TIME; the untimely and unexpected passing of Elizabeth “Betty” Dittler (1925 – 2008), my grandmother. She passed away on August 8th following a short illness. She was survived by her husband, Harry, two daughters, Kathy and Dottie and two grandchildren, David and Amanda. As my mother planned the memorial service, she asked for refreshments for about 25 people – every church pew was filled with over 65 people who took time to celebrate the life of Betty. She is missed everyday.

We love you Betty.